Back to the holiday season, and before I head to the day job, I'll just tell you quickly about Tom, who I mentioned briefly in my Turkish Delight post.
Some years ago, the mutual friend of Blind Date and I were on holiday in Cyprus - a bargain all inclusive deal in the days of Teletext! The down side of 'all inclusive' was that it seemed to us pointless venturing outside the hotel confines and paying for lunch and meals so we stayed put.
On the first evening, we saw an elderly gentlemen dining alone across the room and in the interests of The Big Society which I subscribed too, long before Mr. Cameron came up with the sobriquet, I suggested to said friend that we should ask him to join us the following evening as I hated to see him sitting alone. She readily agreed.
The next day, before we had the chance to extend our kind information we were basking, like a couple of sand snakes round the pool, and the man, who we later discovered was called Tom, appeared. He had clearly had some sort of injury or illness at some time, as had limited use of his left arm and leg and shuffled when he walked. He shuffled over - great, we thought, we could invite him to join us for supper, maybe even lunch....that was before he parked his slacks on the end of my sun lounger and started making extremely inappropriate comments about the way we looked in our swim suits and the size of my chest, whilst smoothing down the few strands of hair covering his sweaty pate. I know we were the only three single people in the hotel, but......
By telepathy, friend and I knew that we would not be dining with him that night or any night...this was not the sweet old gentleman we had suspected...so the invitation thankfully remained unextended! For the remainder of the holiday, every time he shuffled in our direction we were saved by either Roy or Noel - two happily married holiday makers away with their lovely wives - who delighted in humming the Jaws tune as he shuffled closer and then sat on the end of our sun loungers before Tom had the opportunity too!
Our only other dealing with the Predatory Pensioner was one evening in the bar when he sidled up, before Noel had a chance to save us, and leered that he'd been coming to the same hotel for 15 years yet the woman in the painting behind the bar (a tasteful nude with her legs carefully draped in front of her to preserve her modesty) had never opened her legs to give him a better view! Yuk! And, no, I really haven't made it up.....NEXT!
Some years ago, the mutual friend of Blind Date and I were on holiday in Cyprus - a bargain all inclusive deal in the days of Teletext! The down side of 'all inclusive' was that it seemed to us pointless venturing outside the hotel confines and paying for lunch and meals so we stayed put.On the first evening, we saw an elderly gentlemen dining alone across the room and in the interests of The Big Society which I subscribed too, long before Mr. Cameron came up with the sobriquet, I suggested to said friend that we should ask him to join us the following evening as I hated to see him sitting alone. She readily agreed.
The next day, before we had the chance to extend our kind information we were basking, like a couple of sand snakes round the pool, and the man, who we later discovered was called Tom, appeared. He had clearly had some sort of injury or illness at some time, as had limited use of his left arm and leg and shuffled when he walked. He shuffled over - great, we thought, we could invite him to join us for supper, maybe even lunch....that was before he parked his slacks on the end of my sun lounger and started making extremely inappropriate comments about the way we looked in our swim suits and the size of my chest, whilst smoothing down the few strands of hair covering his sweaty pate. I know we were the only three single people in the hotel, but......
By telepathy, friend and I knew that we would not be dining with him that night or any night...this was not the sweet old gentleman we had suspected...so the invitation thankfully remained unextended! For the remainder of the holiday, every time he shuffled in our direction we were saved by either Roy or Noel - two happily married holiday makers away with their lovely wives - who delighted in humming the Jaws tune as he shuffled closer and then sat on the end of our sun loungers before Tom had the opportunity too!
Our only other dealing with the Predatory Pensioner was one evening in the bar when he sidled up, before Noel had a chance to save us, and leered that he'd been coming to the same hotel for 15 years yet the woman in the painting behind the bar (a tasteful nude with her legs carefully draped in front of her to preserve her modesty) had never opened her legs to give him a better view! Yuk! And, no, I really haven't made it up.....NEXT!
No comments:
Post a Comment