Another aquatic episode....having spent yesterday at London Aquarium with my nephew, I was astonished at the similarities between a day out at Sealife and Internet dating! Even Mr. Fish could pull at thie venue!
On arrival you walk over a glass window. If you're brave, or foolhardy enough, to look down you see sharks, sting rays and jelly fish of various shapes and sizes circling below you, ready to silently annihilate their prey; not dissimilar to signing up to several of the larger mating...oops, sorry ... dating sites where the first thing you encounter is various men of varying shapes and sizes ready to devour unsuspecting new female members.
That's where the similarity ends as, for those viewing the real sharks, just like a criminal lawyer visiting a particularly dangerous prisoner, the glass is strengthened and you're safe. Dating sites do not offer the same protection!
As you progress there is opportunity to view all sorts of aquatic and pondlife including fish that can reproduce without procreation and male seahorses which, apparently, can reproduce without female intervention; now, if humans could replicate that it would be huge. Imagine no longer having to traverse the Mars/Venus divide in order to ensure the future of the human race!
The experience reminded me of another dating encounter, with a man who loved water, some years ago, which I'm happy to report didn't progress beyond a few emails. This was the man dubbed - Chlorine Andy!
Chlorine Andy rode the dating waves on Udate - a now defunct dating site but one of the forerunners - and fancied himself as quite athletic due to regular trips to the local municipal baths. So far, all very commendable and I nearly agreed to meet him. That was until the night that he returned from one of his lane swimming marathons and asked if I had a webcam (it was the old days!) and whether I'd like to see him in his Speedos! He added helpfully that I might even be able to smell the chlorine! I don't know what was most disconcerting - the thought of him in a pair of budgie smugglers or the fact that he thought I might find him attractive in his!
Mmmm...maybe not the man for me.Time to revert to dry land, perhaps....have I told you yet about the Russian-speaking dry stone waller....?
On arrival you walk over a glass window. If you're brave, or foolhardy enough, to look down you see sharks, sting rays and jelly fish of various shapes and sizes circling below you, ready to silently annihilate their prey; not dissimilar to signing up to several of the larger mating...oops, sorry ... dating sites where the first thing you encounter is various men of varying shapes and sizes ready to devour unsuspecting new female members.
That's where the similarity ends as, for those viewing the real sharks, just like a criminal lawyer visiting a particularly dangerous prisoner, the glass is strengthened and you're safe. Dating sites do not offer the same protection!
As you progress there is opportunity to view all sorts of aquatic and pondlife including fish that can reproduce without procreation and male seahorses which, apparently, can reproduce without female intervention; now, if humans could replicate that it would be huge. Imagine no longer having to traverse the Mars/Venus divide in order to ensure the future of the human race!
The experience reminded me of another dating encounter, with a man who loved water, some years ago, which I'm happy to report didn't progress beyond a few emails. This was the man dubbed - Chlorine Andy!
Chlorine Andy rode the dating waves on Udate - a now defunct dating site but one of the forerunners - and fancied himself as quite athletic due to regular trips to the local municipal baths. So far, all very commendable and I nearly agreed to meet him. That was until the night that he returned from one of his lane swimming marathons and asked if I had a webcam (it was the old days!) and whether I'd like to see him in his Speedos! He added helpfully that I might even be able to smell the chlorine! I don't know what was most disconcerting - the thought of him in a pair of budgie smugglers or the fact that he thought I might find him attractive in his!
Mmmm...maybe not the man for me.Time to revert to dry land, perhaps....have I told you yet about the Russian-speaking dry stone waller....?
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