This week I had a particularly difficult night at the local nick. Dealing with two juvenile offenders who, whilst by no means angels, were not the prolific professional burglars the police were trying to make out. I was lied too ('We told your colleague this. Didn't she tell you'), undermined ('You don't have to listen to your brief. She's not got your best interests in mind; she's just dragging things out so she gets paid more')...For the uninitiated, criminal legal aid work is not a lucrative business; fixed fees mean that whether you're at the police station for 20 minutes or 20 hours you get paid the same - the grand sum of £220....but worse than the erroneous nonsense being spouted by the local upholders of the law, was their collective appearance....
About halfway through the second interview, I was beginning to wonder whether I was in some sort of parallel universe. Had I stepped back to the bad old days of the 70's -pre-Police & Criminal Evidence Act - when confessions were obtained by all manner of foul means and corruption was rife...it wasn't just the dubious attitudes and shadowy visits to clients' cells when I wasn't present, but the giant hairy caterpillar lookalikes that appeared to be a new and disconcerting trend slithering across the faces of every police officer I encountered.
I felt like I was in the Sweeney or Life on Mars...then the penny dropped - Movember!!
At least the moustaches could be forgiven, if not the rest!
At least it reminded me that I'd promised to make cakes for the office this week to raise money for Movember - two dozen mustachioed fairies (cakes) currently grace my kitchen!
Now there's an interesting concept....
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